Alternate Captions

I think this picture is well suited to alternate captions:

• "Damn, did anyone see where I left my glowsticks"
• "Hi, I'm Dr D. Your new gynecologist. Open up and say meow."
• "Damn SARS! You know, I heard a bastard cat started that whole mess."
• "I'm black, I'm white... Tee hee. Whoo! Can you tell me where the little boy's room is?"

Any more?