Happy Tree Army of One

A friend of mine was just trying to convince me that the U.S. Army uses Happy Tree Friends videos as a training device. He says that the medics are issued copies of the videos as a desensitizing exercise. Sounds like a tall tale to me.

Getting Dumped

This morning I cancelled my training session with Joey. I needed to get rid of all of my cabinet waste before my neighbors threw a fit. Some of it was out on my porch and I could tell that at least one of my neighbors was not too happy.

I rode my bike down to U-Haul and rented a pickup truck. I hired one of the guys that hangs out there to help me move all the waste. Mel the Marine was what he called himself. I was just happy that he spoke English. We negotiated. I figured it would take less than an hour to grab all the crap and take it to the dump so I offered him fifteen dollars. He said that he would usually only do it for twenty, but for me he'd do fifteen. I waited as he tossed all his kneepads, his rollerblades and a large pile of books into the back of the truck. I noticed one book was a textbook, History of America. I guess he just sits and reads all day waiting for someone to hire him.

When we started loading the truck I noticed Mel was kind of clumsy. Which I thought was odd because on the way over he was telling me that he had supreme martial arts skills. He tripped on one of the two stairs in front of my house. Then even after multiple warnings of stray nails he stepped on a board and got a nail in his shoe. Thankfully it stopped before hitting his foot. After I pulled the board off his sneaker he asked if he could go into the bathroom and put his contacts in his eyes. No wonder.

With everything all loaded up we head down to the dump and tossed the stuff. That part was actually fun. Chucking cabinet doors and there goes the kitchen sink. Slam! That bastard was heavy. The dump charged me twenty dollars for all the stuff which weighed 0.3 tons. The receipt came with a California scratch lottery ticket. I gave it to Mel. We tried to expedite because the place smelled like crap. Mel and I couldn't comprehend how someone could work there all day. Mel said, "I don't even want to think about that shit in my lungs. Give me weed smoke, crack, or even cigarettes, but not that shit." I'm not certain how much of that comment was a joke.

I stopped by the grocery store so we could get some drinks. The store was playing Dreams Can Come True. Mel said it was his favorite song and started dancing. Danced all the way to the cold drink isle where I got a Sunny D and he got a beer. I paid and got some cash. I gave twenty to Mel for being cool and dropped him at the laundry mat. The truck came to 27 dollars. It was good to get all that done before work.

So getting that crap to the dump in total cost me:
20 - Mel
1.50 - Beer
27 - Truck
20 - Dump fee
3.50 - Gas
72 - Total

Smash It Up

I am totally rebuilding my kitchen from the flooring up. The past two days I have been smashing down my old kitchen. Making a big fat mess. My friend who was helping me yesterday and I had to stop because I didn't have the proper wrench to disconnect the sink drainage. Then I got up and bought a wrench this morning. I unscrewed one of the joints and the whole drainage structure just fell apart. I probably just should have pulled really hard on the pipes last night.

I'm not so obsessive as to completely computer model all of my furniture and apartment in Maya. My friend Eric did just that. He built a model of his apartment and models of all his furniture. Then he was able to move it all around in the computer to get the super feng shui layout. We told him that he should make a business out of that process. Here in So Cal he could prolly make some bucks.

Everyone should try repairing something in their house. I fixed the toilet last month. The little flap that gets pulled up when you push down the flush handle was broken. I think I got a 2000 bleach flushing tablet too close to it and it warped. It was constantly running. So I replaced it. Not a hard task. It works now and the best part is that every time I flush the toilet. I'm like, "Oh yeah! Oh Yeah! Who's the master of the flush." It's like a mini party every time I expel some waste.

Number 5 is Alive

God of War was voted the fifth best game at E3 this year. That is exciting news. In Gamespy's E3 Awards that's our game at #5!


I found out today that a guy that I work with is a comic book publisher on the side. Weird the things you don't know about people. I don't think anyone at my work knows I have this blog.

Anyway this guy is a part of Shooting Star Comics. He says it is not profitable yet, but hopefully soon will be. This month their comic is a choose your own adventure style thing. I haven't seen it.


Super Size Me was the perfect catalyst for a diet change. I haven't had a caffeinated beverage in a week. I was addicted. I also haven't had any McDonalds, Jack in the Box, Taco Bell, Burger King, In and Out, or any other fast food in the same vein in over a week, but that wasn't as difficult.

Snapple Cap # 156

I just drank a Snapple Mango Madness and my "Real Fact" cap trivia said that the swimming pools in the U.S. contain enough water to cover San Francisco.

What the hell does that mean?

Do they mean that if San Francisco was flat there would be enough water from all the pools to wet the entire surface. If so, at what depth?

Or do they mean that if we built a wall around the city of San Francisco and dumped all the swimming pools in there it would be enough water to cover all the hills and buildings?

Are we counting only personal home swimming pools? Do Olympic size pools at gyms and schools count? How about water parks?

It all sounds homophobic to me. Why San Francisco? Why chlorinated water? Is it some kind of subliminal message that we need to baptize all the gay people?

Snapple cap facts are so annoying.

Surf Video

My friend Chad's mother video taped us surfing on Tuesday. Most of the video was unfocused pictures of sky and sand. The only portion that did come out was me having a crappy backside ride on a crappy wave. Check it out.

It has begun

E3 opens today. The statue they made to promote our game, God Of War, turned out odd. The statue is of our main character, Kretos. I suppose the sculptor was trying to make him look buff, but he has no neck at all. No neck to the point where it is bad. He looks like a mini-me Cretos, captain of the lollipop guild. Oh well. I think the medusa head looks good. Then there is always the fact that game still rocks. So I got that going for me... which is nice. ( photo by Alex Stein ) Posted by Hello

Calling All Americans

I saw Super Size Me on Sunday. It has got to be the best movie ever made. It is like Bowling for Columbine but closer to home. So close it may be in your stomach right now. It's like Scared Straight but with Ronald McDonald screaming, "I'm gonna rape your liver, boy!" We as Americans need to change our thoughts on fast food. If only so I don't have to punch my kid in the face every time I drive passed a McDonald's.

I remember on a family vacation my three sisters and I were chanting, "Mc-Don-alds Mc-Don-alds..." What parent could go up against that resistance. If they had taken us anywhere else there would have been a riot. How gross is that!

Another really great surf session this morning.


Today was really good surf! I pulled a floater for the first time. Went down the line on several good waves, front side and back side. Smacked the lip backside. All around good surfing day. Nobody was out there either. I wonder if most people thought it looked to big or if they were scared away by the shark. There were times when I was out there and I psyched myself out thinking about it. But I don't believe in sharks, so there.

Very Merry Unbirthday

I just found a birthday card I got from my dad. It is probably from last year or the year before. It is the best birthday card ever. It has pictures of his ship on the outside and on the inside it very simply says, "Hi Bud, Happy Birthday. Love, Dad." He printed out on his printer at home.

He is a chief engineer on an oil tanker. The pictures of the tanker are just amazing. One is of his ship in dry dock. They pull the ship into a special docking area, then they support it and pump all the water out. That way they can easily inspect and repair the lower, underwater portions of the hull. The astounding part is that the propeller is like 23 feet across! Insane!

No Office Space

I am very thankful for having my job. It is, in my opinion, one of the most fun jobs a person could have. I make video games. I spend my days making skeletons attack and climb ropes, making monsters breathe fire, making blood spray all over the place. I do this using mathematics and algorithms and code. I love it.

Some people don't understand, especially when I have to work on a Saturday. Some of my friends might say, "Oh, you have to work today, that sucks." I put it to them like this, since most of them are struggling actors. If you got a part on a really big movie that you were really excited about you'd get up early and work long hours for it, right? Well, that is my job, to me.

Then I look around work, there are other people who have better tasks then me. We got a concept artist who's job is to draw naked hot chicks. Then he gives those drawings to a 3D artist who's job is to build 3D models of the naked hot chicks. Wow. You think at the end of the day he goes home and says, "If I have to see another naked woman I'll... for Christ sake honey would you cover yourself."

Drive-Thru Blood Bank

Two movies I want to see are comming out this weekend Super Size Me and Van Helsing.

I just heard the buzz that Van Helsing is a turd. Oh, well, I guess I'm going to get Super Sized.

Is it me?

My dad opened up his AOL the other morning and was shocked. There on the home page of the AOL browser was a picture of me, at least he thought. He was so convinced that the picture was me. He took a picture of the monitor with his digital camera and sent it to me. He showed it to most of my family back in Florida and they all concurred that it was me. It is not me! I wish that it was cause that guy prolly got paid, but it's not me. Either my family forgot what I look like or this guy looks a lot like me. I think he looks a bit like me which means that to most other people, those who don't see my face in the mirror every day, he must look a lot like me. So I can postpone my trip back to Florida. Posted by Hello


Friday night from my living room I heard someone smashing things in the alley. It's nice out so I have my windows open all day and night. The sound was very clear. It sounded like car parts being hit with a bat and then young boys laughing. I guess they ran off by the time I got my shoes on and went outside there was no one about. They had cracked the window of a Saturn, a tail light on a Civic and a tail light on my car. I called the police. They found the thing that the kids were smashing stuff with and were going to have it finger printed. They took my statement and I went to bed. I was not too upset, it seemed like just random young boy shenanigans.

Then last night I was awoken by more smashing sounds. Being in bed it took me much longer to get out to the alley. A few of my neighbors were out surveying the damages. I found out that one of my neighbors was waiting and took off running after the attackers. He tackled one and the cops arrested the 14 year old boy. I'm sure that he didn't even hesitate in giving up his pal.

The boys had broken out the window of the Saturn which they had previously only cracked and they smashed my other tail light. I am pissed now because it has become more of a personal attack, hitting the same targets twice. What kind of moron tries to smash the same cars two nights in a row.

I wonder what is going to happen to those kids. I wonder if they live near me. With them being juveniles I will probably never find out their identities. I will wonder every time I see a young boy in the neighborhood if he is the bastard who smashed my tail lights.